We are born and at some point in our life we are going to die.  Some of us experience a lot of death in our lives but others do not.  I watched my great-aunt die 17 years ago while my mother was her caretaker.  She was suffering from lung cancer.  My mom spent six months driving back and forth from Dallas to East Texas to take care of her. I spent several weeks there myself because I had just suffered a miscarriage and it helped me to be away from home.

Two years ago my dad finally got to a point that he no longer wanted to fight his disease anymore and he came home from the hospital with hospice. He only lived four days after he came home.  It was really hard to watch my dad deteriorate over the course of four years. I was able to spend three of those four days with him.  After my dad died I was lost and I had so much to do to help my mom. I still miss him so much but it has gotten a bit easier over the last couple of years.

Now I am dealing with death again. My mom got involved with another man about 6 months after my father passed away. At first it was really weird but over the course of the last year I got used to the situation and I started to really like him. He was diagnosed with lung cancer about a year or so ago. He was in the hospital and went through chemo and radiation until he finally had about four months of remission last fall. He started getting sick again in January and now he is at home and hospice.  My mom is with him almost all the time.  She is restless and basically she is stuck waiting for him to die.  I feel so bad for her because I know it will be so hard on her when he’s gone. I have spent every day this last week trying to support her and help her however I can. It is so sad that my mom is having to go through something like this again. She has always been so great to everyone around her. My kids came home today so I won’t be able to help her this weekend and I am really worried about her. I am not sure how the weekend will go but I do know that I am going to do everything I can to help my mom as she continues to deal with this situation and her grief afterwards.

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